LIVING THE CORNISH DREAM FOR A DAY
What is the Cornish dream? Maybe you have heard of the American dream, for many people in the UK the dream of living by the coast is one only some can achieve. With the cost of houses being so high in Cornwall living close to the sea is almost impossible, and with second home buyers being a leading issue it is becoming more difficult for local people to afford to live where they grew up. Although the term ‘The Cornish Dream’ has been noted by locals to be a myth designed only to attract people, it is a term I am familiar with as an Emmet and student - quite frankly who wouldn’t want to live by the sea!
The Cornish Dream is subjective, but I consider it to be living on the coast overlooking the sea with an unobstructed view of the gleaming blue sea and sun rising or setting on the horizon. Your day-to-day life is leisurely walking along the unspoilt coastal paths / beaches and being able to experience the sea in the form of sailing / rowing / swimming or kayaking. Having the ability to encounter nature with dolphins, seals and the occasional whale, visiting gardens with tropical plants and even having some in your own garden. In the summer evenings sitting back in your garden chair relaxing and looking at the coast with the sea breeze gently blowing and winter days in the living room behind large glass windows.
From a young age my parents had always taken me to Cornwall on holiday and the idea of living by the sea was always something they aspired to, although we never did. Fast forward to now 21 years of age and I have been living in Cornwall for the last 2 and a half years as a student.
Living is Cornwall is so ‘dreamy’, the day light is brighter and longer with constantly changing vibrant colours, add in the motion and noise of the waves making it such a peaceful and relaxing place to live.
I was lucky enough to find myself in a situation to experience the Cornish Dream, albeit it just for one day.
I arranged to meet with Tony (a local man who grew up in Boscastle) at 11:30am for coffee and to discuss a project I was interested in documenting being the male voice choir for which he was a member. Tony was a local man who left Cornwall to pursue a career and make a living in the Oil industry. Little did I know this discussion would end up on a sailing trip down the Fal.
I met Tony a week before, after I found myself stranded in Flushing following a ferry ride from Falmouth on a day that could only be described as ‘British weather’– dismal, I was drenched.
Unexpectedly when I asked the captain what time the ferry would be returning to Falmouth he said due to the tide it wouldn’t be returning for another 3 hours. Seeking refuge from the downpour, I entered Flushing Rowing Club, where a handful of members were painting boats. I figured, ‘why not’ and wandered in taking photographs and striking up conversations. As time went by, most members left the club apart from Tony, where we spent an hour exchanging tales, and somehow sailing slipped into conversation. I mentioned my complete lack of sailing experience and like a true sailor, he offered to show me his boat.
I thought no more of sailing and arranged to meet Tony to discuss a photographic project regarding the male voice choir. Over coffee he started talking about moving his boat back to his mooring spot closer to home, as he needed to move it due to storm ‘Ciaran’ the week before. I asked him when he was thinking of doing it and to my surprise he asked if I wanted to help him do it now. I looked down at what I was wearing and laughed, he asked me if I had a coat, unfortunately I did not. We quickly finished our drinks and arranged to meet in half an hour at my house in Falmouth.
Now dressed in appropriate clothing, wearing a Helly Hanson coat (very sailor like) and camera in hand he drove me back to his home in Feock. We drove closer and closer to the coast until we came to a single road which unveiled a picturesque scene, houses positioned either side overlooking the sea. He described one side to be the ‘money’ side and the side he lived on to be the ‘sunny’ side, he explained the sun set on the side he lived. We neared the end of the road and finally he drove into his drive, where we were greeted by a sea view. I was taken aback by the house and position overlooking the sea, he invited me in for a cup of tea. I took my boots off and slowly wandered into his home, all the time looking back at the breath taking sea view. A sliding door stretched the length of the house a feature making the most of the landscape, I could imagine myself sitting and relaxing watching the boats and days go by. The open plan space included a sea view from the kitchen, living and dining rooms.
Tony had briefly spoken about his wife (Sharon) and her interests, including yoga where she had been earlier that day. She was kind and welcomed me into her home with energy asking me how I took my tea and offering food as she insisted it would only take a few minutes. I couldn’t say no, Tony and I enjoyed scrambled eggs on a muffin with smoked salmon, it tasted delightful. We sat and chatted about their children, although I couldn’t help but look past them at times as the view behind was breath-taking, I couldn’t quite believe I was sat in someone’s house eating, overlooking the sea.
After we finished Sharon showed me her art collection as I was interest in some of the pieces on the wall, it was at this point I decided to show her my own artwork as I thought she might like it, I think she did…
We left in the car driving towards the King Harry Ferry to cross to the other side where the boat was currently moored. We arrived at the place where Tony had tied up his small inflatable dingy, he insisted he didn’t want any help carrying the dingy to the water, I did offer. He placed all his things needed into the small boat and motioned for me to get in. Holding my camera, I slowly and carefully got into the dingy that to my surprise was rather deflated, he rowed us out into the middle of the Fal avoiding the anchored boats. I still had no Idea at this point what the boat actually looked like until he said “there she is.” Nyleptha was a lot bigger than I expected. A 43ft elan – built in 2008 which Tony had purchased in 2014 from Hamble 8. I was amazed! I clambered aboard the boat where I stood pretending, I wasn’t in shock.
He briefed me on the whole boat, what to check before setting off, how to make sure the engine is working, all very technical aspects including lots of safety information. Quite frankly I can’t remember any of it apart from the fact that the boat can sink if you don’t close the switch on the toilet, I was now very paranoid about not flicking it. In fact, after I had been to the toilet, I asked Tony to check if I had closed it correctly - I had. Hopefully he invites me back and I will slowly pick up more of the safety procedures. I do remember the three points of contact when walking to the stern of the boat is very important, I also know how to neatly put a rope away. I did remember something even if it was not as important as other safety items.
“Grab the wheel” Tony instructed. My mission: to spin the boat 180 degrees while he un-anchored. There I stood behind the wheel for the first time steering this magnificent vessel, sailing alongside a man I had met just a week ago on a dismal wet day in Flushing.
The day will be forever etched in my memory, a tale of spontaneity and an unexpected adventure. Had the ferry not been delayed, or if it hadn’t been such a miserable day I would not have sought refuge at the rowing club. Would I have met Tony and experienced his incredible boat?. Life sometimes demands a dash of audacity, courage, a bit of a gamble and this time my audacity led to a chance of a life time and ability to document an extraordinary experience, one I never imagined having.
Having met up with Tony after that special day, we have spoken a lot and he has given me so much time for which I am so very grateful. He loves the independent spirit of Cornwall, the people and the culture. You can’t just walk in to these things you have to prop the door open and work your way in building trust with the people of Cornwall. There is depth you might not be able to see from the outside. Tony believes he is living the dream but has always said who knows what’s around the corner for him and his wife.
Tony was born in St Austell and grew up in Boscastle on his parents farm, he was 1 of 7 children. His life was based in Cornwall until the age of 19 where unfortunately the reality of Cornwall meant you had to leave to seek new opportunities, slightly different to the Cornwall we see today. He took a degree at Kingston Polytech studying geology for four years. He did not enjoy London because of the lack of community and constant rush, he decided to come home to work on his parents farm before securing his first job in the Oil industry working in the North Sea.
He travelled a lot with his job working in Scotland, Germany, Greece, Norway, France, Algeria, Tunisia, Libya, Singapore, America, Taiwan until he met his wife Sharon in Indonesia in 1980 where she was teaching English as a foreign language. He joined an acting group where Sharon was leading lady ‘Jakarta players’ and had their first date at the Mandarin hotel. They eventually moved to Scotland where they had three children.
Tony said he was only programmed to work and when good fortune came to him and his wife, they had a decision to make whether to retire or not. They debated the topic and decided they would retire. His wife suggested Spain with a house overlooking the blue sea. “But what does day 2 look like?” Tony asked “Well you could play tennis” his wife replied. “Anything else?” asked Tony. There was a silence for several weeks. Then his wife said, “what about France?” Tony said “yeah I kind of get France I speak the language” but he wasn’t overly keen, another silence. “Why don’t we retire to Dorset?” his wife suggested, silence… and then she said “what about Devon, then she finally said “I get it we are going to Cornwall aren’t we” Tony replied “yeah why not” (I’m sure he replied with a big grin on his face).
Tony claims the South coast where he lives now was a great decision in comparison to where he grew up in North Cornwall, as he has all the benefits of the sea together with being only ten minutes from Truro City. However, he says his wife still gets ‘Cornish claustrophobia’ being stuck at the end of the world, as you have to make a conscious effort to leave Cornwall. Tony appreciates how exceptionally fortunate he is and is really at home in Cornwall, he loves being part of the choir and gig club with at least a row twice a week in the sea. However, Cornwall is not the place he left all those years ago as its less insular and much more cosmopolitan, he says there are both positive and negative changes albeit this will vary from person to person depending on their viewpoint.
But why did he share his lifestyle with me for a day? He said if there was something from his day to day life, that he could share and pass on to benefit others then he was more than happy to help. Tony said be bold and don’t be frightened of taking a chance, what’s the worst thing that could happen? He says education is the key and gives you a chance to pick yourself up in the real world and be able to make something from nothing. It gives you a chance to see opportunities and is the reason why he likes talking and sharing his experiences. There is more to this story than just spending a day with a local Cornishman and having an amazing day on his boat. Its about taking a chance and in some respects being cheeky, knocking on the right door and opening an opportunity for myself that I certainly would not have had if I hadn’t been bold.
His wife asked him why he keeps talking and sharing his life with me, Tony said he really values young people and suggests the older generation doesn’t always take the time and trouble to talk anymore, together with the fact the younger generation does not always take the time to listen. He said they can also learn from the younger generation because the world we are currently living within is ever changing, especially with technology. The world can be confusing and brings challenges for all age groups its whether we want to take the time to educate ourselves and keep up to date with technology.
It may be thought of as unusual for someone to randomly enter a gig rowing shed to seek refuge from the rain and engage in conversation and photograph a group of strangers. Tony, commented on my spontaneity as impressive. In that spontaneous encounter, both Tony and I swiftly formed impressions of each other. My inclination toward listening over talking often guides me, although occasionally as evidenced by my incomplete grasp of the boat's safety briefing, I miss certain details. However, conversing with Tony, I, a 21-year-old on the brink of completing university, gleaned valuable insights. The conversation highlighted the importance of seizing opportunities in this transitional phase of life. Despite the perceived scarcity of opportunities, the key remains in actively pursuing them, knocking on doors, and keep trying until that opportunity presents itself.
